Why would a loving God allow so much suffering as a person is dying?

Our lack of understanding this can cause us to conform to the secular view of suffering where pain has no value. We need to conform to Jesus' view of suffering and He said:

"If anyone desires to come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me" (Matthew 16:24).

Why did Jesus say this? It is because He knows all of the benefits that can come from this and He doesn’t want us to miss out on them!

Our Catholic Faith teaches us that verything Jesus assumed while he was living on earth, He redeemed. We know that He assumed human suffering so, for that reason, it has been redeemed. This means that a greater good can come from this pain now if it is offered to Him. A good that far exceeds the evil of the suffering. When it comes to the suffering that a person goes through when they are dying, Jesus teaches us through His Church that a holy acceptance of death and the suffering this entails is:

1. A means of avoiding Purgatory. 

2. A means of advancing in the degree of glory we will enjoy in Heaven. 

We need an increase of Faith to understand and accept this. Faith is the theological virtue that enables us to see things from God's perspective. One of the effects of this is that our vision of earthly realities like suffering is elevated and greatly enriched. When a person is dying and we see that they are suffering greatly, we may feel anxious and wish that his or her suffering would end as soon as possible and we might even be tempted to consent to giving them pain medication that would put them into a coma-like state. This is because our view of suffering is only at a natural level and needs to be elevated to a supernatural level by the gift of Faith. It would be a mistake to give into this temptation. Yes, we should try to relieve their pain as much as possible but not to the point where they lose consciousness. Instead, this is a time to help them to submit to God's will in order to:

1. Be purified of sin and lessen their need for purgatory. The saints tell us that the bitterest pains of earth are as nothing compared to purgatory.

2. And to gain great merit for eternal life.

In fact the Church teaches us the following very important truth: The humble and submissive acceptance of death in expiation of our sins is a generous act, by which we make a sacrifice of our life to God, in union with the sacrifice of Jesus Christ upon the cross.

Catechism of the Catholic Church:

1473 The forgiveness of sin and restoration of communion with God entail the remission of the eternal punishment of sin, but temporal punishment of sin remains. While patiently bearing sufferings and trials of all kinds and, when the day comes, serenely facing death, the Christian must strive to accept this temporal punishment of sin as a grace. He should strive by works of mercy and charity, as well as by prayer and the various practices of penance, to put off completely the "old man" and to put on the "new man"(Eph 4:22,24).

Here is a true story that shows how important this is:

Sister Mary of St. Joseph, one of the first four Carmelites to embrace the reform of St. Teresa of Avila, was a Religious of great virtue. The end of her life approached, and Our Lord, wishing that His spouse (Sister Mary of St. Joseph) should be received into Heaven in triumph on breathing her last sigh, purified and adorned her soul by the sufferings which marked the end of her life.

During the four last days which she passed upon earth, she lost her speech and the use of her senses; she was a prey to frightful agony, and her Religious sisters were heartbroken to see her in that state. Mother Isabella of St. Dominic, Prioress of the convent, approached the sick Religious, and suggested to her to make many acts of resignation, and total abandonment of herself into the hands of God. Sister Mary of Joseph heard her, and made these acts interiorly, but without being able to give any exterior sign thereof.

She died in these holy dispositions, and, on the very day of her death, whilst Mother Isabella was hearing Mass and praying for the repose of her soul, Our Lord showed her the soul of His faithful spouse (Sister Mary of St. Joseph) crowned in glory, and said, “She is of the number of those who follow the Lamb.” Sister Mary of St. Joseph, on her part, thanked Mother Isabella for all the good she had procured for her at the hour of death. She added that the acts of resignation which she had suggested to her had merited for her great glory in Paradise and had exempted her from the pains of Purgatory (Life of Mother Isabella, lib. 3, c. 7).

What happiness to quit this miserable life, to enter the only true and blessed one! We all may enjoy this happiness, if we employ the means which Jesus Christ has given us for making satisfaction in this world, and for preparing our souls perfectly to appear in His presence.

Each cross that we bear through, with and in Christ not only makes retribution to God's justice for the temporal consequences of our sins and could greatly lessen our need for purgatory, if not totally eliminate it, it also increases the degree of His glory that we will participate in - in heaven. This suffering that we bear in, with and through Christ, is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory - it is increasing our capacity to love and our growth in virtue – making us more like Christ. This increases the degree of His glory that we will participate in - in heaven. Every cross that we bear patiently and offer as an intercessory prayer for others, increases our glory from one degree to another. This is especially true when we are dying and facing our final battle:

Romans 8:16-18

“For the Spirit Himself gives testimony to our spirit that we are the sons of God. And if sons, heirs also; heirs indeed of God and joint heirs with Christ: yet so, if we suffer with Him, that we may be also glorified with Him. The sufferings of this time are not worthy to be compared with the glory to come that shall be revealed in us.”

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed every day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, because we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen; for the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. 

Diary of St. Faustina - #605

"O Holy Trinity, Eternal God, I thank You for allowing me to know the greatness and the various degrees of glory to which souls attain. Oh, what a great difference of depth in the knowledge of God there is between one degree and another! Oh, if people could only know this! O my God, if I were thereby able to attain one more degree, I would gladly suffer all the torments of the martyrs put together.”

Let's support our loved ones who are dying with encouragement to make many acts of submission to the Will of God and to offer up their suffering in expiation for the temporal consequences of their sins. One of the most important ways to support them is to make sure they receive the Last Rites while they are still conscious. The Last Rites include the Anointing of the Sick, Confession, Holy Communion and the Apostolic Blessing. This will give them the strength to carry the cross of suffering and death.